Internal Control

Take a moment to recall the last time your mood or productivity was compromised by external events. Perhaps an eagerly anticipated day outdoors was ruined due to adverse weather conditions, or maybe the movie you had been dying to see was unavailable at Blockbuster. Regardless of the scenario, it is common that we allow our mood states and productivity to be directly influenced by environmental or situational factors.

In relation to my own life, I am reminded of a recent trip I took to Texas with a few friends. While I knew from the very beginning that the purpose of the trip was essentially to party, my reaction to this realization was somewhat surprising. At home in Arvada I have been making a conscious effort to show ultimate respect for my body by exercising, following a healthy diet, and limiting, if not abstaining from, excessive alcohol consumption. In a way, the goal is to adopt these sort of behaviors as lifestyle principles, not merely a temporary burst of self improvement techniques. Sadly, taken away from my familiar surroundings, I found that good intentions were not enough to combat the relentless influence of my social surroundings. I failed to live up to my personal standards time and time again, and worse yet, the trend snowballed. Neglecting one promise I had made to myself made it that much easier to break subsequent personal health contracts. The drinking, overeating, and lack of exercise not only took a toll on my physical health, but my psychological well-being suffered as well. I became frustrated with the perception that my environment seemed dead set on contradicting the goals I had set for myself. It was not long before my demeanor and attitude became uncharacteristically negative. While I was not explicitly rude to the people around me, I was also certainly not as cheerful and positive as I generally aim to be.

Looking back on this experience, I am somewhat disappointed that I allowed my negative interpretation of the situation get the best of me, turning what should have been a fun time with friends into a period of self-judgment and disappointment. However, I am confident that there is an important lesson to be learned from all of this. If I am to be realistic and honest with myself, I could have made much healthier choices throughout the trip. I did not have to drink more than I had planned. I chose to. I did not have to eat unhealthy and oversized meals. I chose to. I could have gone running during down time, but I chose not to. Instead of being proactive and making healthy decisions, I instead opted to be submissive and reactive, letting my environment determine my behavior.

I find this subject of proactivity vs reactivity to be an especially salient one in our culture. Too often we attribute the outcomes in our lives to external factors- a teacher, a parent, a boss, the economy, the weather, God, sickness, fate, even the stars. To me, if one is to reach their full potential, it is critical to realize that much of what happens in our lives is a direct result of our own decisions, and while certain uncontrollable situations will inevitably arise, we have the freedom to choose how we react to these circumstances. Victor Frankl, holocaust survivor, psychotherapist, and author of Mans Search For Meaning, contends that "the one thing you cannot take away from me is the way I choose to respond to what you do to me. The last of one's freedoms is to choose ones attitude in any given circumstance". Frankl was a man who overcame the unspeakable cruelties of life in a death camp by finding a deep meaning in his own existence, and inevitably led by example to help others do the same.

Whether we are endowed with liberties and freedoms, as most Americans are, or forced, like Frankl, to exercise the one and only guaranteed right that cannot be taken from us, the point is the same. The most content among us are those who understand that state of mind can be a choice that comes from within, not necessarily a product of circumstance or environment. Likewise, the most productive people are those who are proactive and take responsibility for their existence by focusing primarily on that which they can control. For me, it seems that the most direct path to personal empowerment is to cease blaming people and circumstances when problems arise, and instead adopt the philosophy that allows us to search internally for workable solutions. I find it comforting to know that, in the end, we have the power to propel our lives in the direction of our choosing and the freedom to work diligently towards the realization of our dreams.